Too much thinking is not always a good thing

Mon 12 – Sun 18 April 2021

Last week was the week things started to reopen and my final one before starting a new job – details next blog once I am more settled in. Indeed, this week is a full induction week all taking place on zoom, of course. 🙁 TBH, I am nervous as my last new start was at Comic well over a decade ago. Suppose it will be nice to have the experience of being the newbie. Indeed, strange to take delivery of my new laptop plus I’m going to have to find my way around new software, programmes, and processes. Almost certain that this anxiety was why I was doing lots of over-thinking last week.

Now I would normally say thinking is a good thing. If we all thought more then the world could be a better place. Though you can definitely over-think things. My problem last week was waking in the middle of the night with my brain whirring. Some of the thoughts I had in the middle of the night included:

  • If we lead our lives from the perspective that we are going to die then we may enjoy life more
  • Ultimately it’s all about sustainability, if we don’t get that right then there is no hope for the planet or society
  • We all manipulate each other in various ways and are in turn manipulated

‘All shall be well and all shall be well and all manner of things shall be well.’

Julia of Norwich

Health and Efficiency

Sleep

In my previous blog (read it here), I wrote about how my sleep has gone bad particularly with me waking very early. The fact I have also been waking in the middle of the night with my brain over-thinking obviously shows that my sleep patterns have taken a definite turn for the worse. I’m still knacked by about 9pm and off to bed to do an hour or so of reading. Then I crash out till I awake in the middle of the night and my head is everywhere for quite a while before I crash back to sleep. But then I am awake by 6 to drift in and out of half-sleep until I get up around 7. Can only hope my sleep gets back into a more normal stride as I get into my new post.

over-thinking

Sight

As I age so I note things are starting to go wrong. I have written about my knee problems which I must get checked out. Though worth noting that the NHS waiting list for operations hit nearly 5 million last week. 🙁 The other thing I am noting is that my eyesight is definitely getting worse. I have to wear reading glasses but I can tell my eyes are generally worsening – so often they feel tired and blurred. Don’t want to over-think it as it’s just part of getting older. But not great with my emphasis on reading and life largely spent looking at a pooter or phone screen.

Walks and weight

I’m thinking of going back to my slow jog-runs, just once a week would be great. But will I have time with the return to work? Did achieve 4 lovely long walks within my support bubble between Dave’s and mum’s. My head is always in a good place after these walks though I’m physically tired. I’m pretty sure that the calorie burn from these helps keep my weight under control. And pleased to report that this stays in the 13-3 to 13-5 ‘safe zone’.

Friends and Family

Irene

In my previous blog (read it here), I detailed how I connected up with several friends. Not as many the week just gone though, of course, I had my weekly catch up with Philip / Phyllis in Torremolinos who is doing OK. But there was one particular great catch up last week, with my old work colleague Irene. So nice to have a walk and talk, this time along the Thames from Embankment to Borough Market and back again. Catching up on how we are both doing, plans for the future, and news about old colleagues. 🙂

Mum and Dave

They are both OK. I was with mum for the Duke of Edinburgh’s funeral on Saturday. And Dave came to join us. For my mum’s generation, this marked a major moment in their lives. A nice funeral, if you can ever call such an event that. The stripped simplicity caused by lockdown made it more moving – it felt more about the person and the family rather than being public spectacle.

Books and Reading

‘Piranesi’ by Susanna Clarke

This really is a book to get you thinking. Clarke is not a prodigious writer but a good one. Her major former book was the absolutely brilliant ‘Jonathan Strange and Mr Norrell’. One of the books that really reawakened my love of reading. And this one is similar in that real life is mixed with magic and people travel to other realms though no faeries this time. Rather it’s the story of one person exploiting another, and the voyage of discovery in finding and understanding evil. A concise and thoughtful book I would recommend.

Still got to finish my book of Iris Wildthyme adventures as well as another Dr Who novella I have started. Meanwhile, I’ve begun reading Hamnet by Maggie O’Farrell. It’s had many plaudits and is a fictional account of the real-life death of Shakespeare’s young son.

Sustainability

My reawakened sense of nature continues with appreciation of the plants and the birds on Dave’s balcony. And I continue offloading belongings online to earn income and loosen the materialistic ties I have created for myself over the years. It is very true – you can’t take it with you. I’m also thinking a lot about the central conundrum around the climate crisis: can we have sustainable growth or is the only option no growth to stop any more damage to the planet?

Back to the charity shops

Great to pop along to our reopened favourite charity shop on Thurs. And lovely to see the manager Chris. ‘What did you do during the third lockdown?’ is a pretty pointless question as none of us did anything. They are accepting donations so we can take down the big bag of stuff we have sorted out. Managed to control my passion to buy lots of things. 🙂

Art and Culture

Online

Not much consumed last week. Not sure quite why, perhaps I am spending too much time thinking and instead should fill my time with mindless entertainment. For the latter there was the soaps, Line of Duty, Great British Sewing Bee, and First Date Hotels. 🙂 Still plodding onwards through Survivors and watching the film ‘Lacombe, Lucien’. So looking forward to galleries, museums, cinemas, and theatres reopening. Though everything will have to be booked. The pandemic really has taken away the enjoyment of spontaneity.

Music

Pretty sure I’ve written in one of my previous blogs about how I like background music playing whilst I am doing other stuff. And, particularly on a Friday evening, how I love to listen to Danny Howard and Pete Tong on Radio 1 whilst I am lying in bed reading or just lying there thinking and drifting till I fall asleep. Danny’s been going a bit too ‘poppy’ recently but I love the heavy dance, club, and abstract feel of Pete Tong’s music. And it was great to listen to him on the Friday just gone as well as on catch up at various other times. 🙂

tunes in darkness

Personal Development

Languages and Tech

Focus on these as usual but never doing as much as I want to. 🙁 I’m really not sure how effective my little dips in and out of learning are. I couldn’t hold a conversation with somebody in Russian or Greek. And now I’m at the stage of doing exercises on Free Code Camp that just highlight what I don’t know. Still I suppose something is better than nothing and I am laying building blocks that would be the foundation if I wanted to take things seriously.

Digital detox

With my sustainability push, I am trying to tidy my life and get rid of some of the physical stuff unnecessary in it. And I am trying to extend that to the digital domain. It’s so easy to shovel crap into e-space and leave it there. Doesn’t do harm generally but it’s messy. I once had a boss with over 10,000 emails in her inbox at any time and she kept everything in alphabetical rather than date order to keep on top of it. 🙁 So last week I started sorting through files and emails, deleting and sub-foldering them. Gives a sense of control in your life even if it is possibly quite illusory. 🙂

Delete

The Week Ahead

  • It’s all about the induction programme for my new job. Full days Mon, Tues, and Wed then half days on Thurs and Fri. I will be owed a day off straight away as my contract is only 3 days p.w. 🙂
  • Focus on getting through the week by just letting things be rather than thinking about them too much
  • Only 2 long walks next week as I will be spending a lot of time in front of the pooter on my induction. Good that I’ve got my standing desk so I’m not just sitting on my fat arse all the time. 🙂
  • No plans to catch up with friends bar Phyllis. Something spontaneous may happen, who knows – depends how the week goes…
  • Will definitely finish the Iris Wildthyme and Dr Who novella as well as carry on with Hamnet
  • Be nice to do more online culture than I achieved last week. In the least, I am sure it would help me relax.
  • Full speed ahead (as much as is possible) around personal development and sustainability 🙂

And Finally…

‘Believe those who are seeking the truth. Doubt those who find it.’

Andre Gide

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.